It’s strange how you can measure how much you like somebody by much they can inspire you. You could be inspired to work harder or it could open up a creative part of you you never knew you had before. It can give you that added drive you had been lacking, or even that spurt of inspiration you had been seeking. Those little things that can power you over the line without you even picking up on it.
The reason I am writing about this topic is because I have slowly been losing my inspiration to write. This is partly down to my busy lifestyle, but I have also zeroed into part that had affected it the most. The little flame in my head, that burning thought of a potential interest that has gradually fizzled out.
I took time out of the dating game after her for a bit. I went cold turkey with women and I solely concentrated on work, studying and the gym. This led to the diminishing thought of her, along with my creativity.
In a bid to find my creativity again and what ignites my spark I entered the dating pool again. It instantly boasted my confidence and I started to find my strengths when courting other women.
So I started dating this student. I say dating, to me it was just meeting up and hanging out- you know, grabbing a coffee, an occasionally movie and sex.
This is the part where I realised that if she is not inspiring you then there’s something not there. I lay there at 4am one morning with her sprawled over me as she tried to make conversation with me. All I could think of is that I would rather be with somebody that energises me and makes me want more.
This is not to say she isn’t a good person. She might be a guiding light for somebody else. She just wasn’t for me. And I don’t think it would be fair on either of us if I had to settle for not being satisfied in mind, body and spirit and she had to put up with only getting part of me and I would rather not have her resenting me for that.
So I did that the hard thing and cut her loose. It’s odd to think somebody could really like you and think they have a connection with you and you feel nothing. I guess in that way life isn’t fair. I explained to her that one day she won’t have to put up with an “f*ck boy” like me and she will find somebody who inspires her like she has never been in inspired before.
So never settle. Find that somebody that inspires you to be more. Search high and low for that somebody that makes you dream big. They’re out there waiting for you.